You all know I work in education, right?
No, not the education of Robpornery...although...
As an professional educator, I often have "homework".
This "homework" usually blows and sucks, all at the same time, and not in any kind of good way.
Well, my "homework" tonight kicked ass!
AngryBadgerGirl, the baddest badger around, asked for some help to support her latest fic, The Naked Guy Upstairs.
aka
TNGUS
aka
The best against the wall lemon I have ever read and a really funny and sweet fic you should be reading.
Plus, she totally wrote my first "dive" into lemony fics (Frenemies).
I was never the sane, I mean same.
Oh, she also asked Rob the most awesome question at Comic Con this year...you know the one about him being in more comedic roles and he said he wasn't sure he was witty enough but that he could act like an idiot and one of his legs is longer than the other and she said he ran like a palsied chicken and he laughed and this is the longest sentence I have ever written, kthxbai.
Anyway, she wanted some help in the way of Rob pics; apparently I have a "reputation"...I have NO IDEA why...anyway, she needed pics of HHH's moles.
Oh, you know the ones!
Like this one!
As an professional educator, I often have "homework".
This "homework" usually blows and sucks, all at the same time, and not in any kind of good way.
Well, my "homework" tonight kicked ass!
AngryBadgerGirl, the baddest badger around, asked for some help to support her latest fic, The Naked Guy Upstairs.
aka
TNGUS
aka
The best against the wall lemon I have ever read and a really funny and sweet fic you should be reading.
Plus, she totally wrote my first "dive" into lemony fics (Frenemies).
I was never the sane, I mean same.
Oh, she also asked Rob the most awesome question at Comic Con this year...you know the one about him being in more comedic roles and he said he wasn't sure he was witty enough but that he could act like an idiot and one of his legs is longer than the other and she said he ran like a palsied chicken and he laughed and this is the longest sentence I have ever written, kthxbai.
Anyway, she wanted some help in the way of Rob pics; apparently I have a "reputation"...I have NO IDEA why...anyway, she needed pics of HHH's moles.
Oh, you know the ones!
Like this one!
Here was my lesson plan for my assignment!
Topic: Robert Pattinson's Moles
Objective: Find as many HQ pics featuring Rob's many beautiful beauty marks, in as many locations as possible for educational purposes of RobPorney and in the name of Fan Fiction.
Materials: Laptop, Gigantic Hardrive of RobPornery, my finguhs, Google mail and a drool bucket.
Finished Product:
(click on the thumbnails for largeness)
Objective: Find as many HQ pics featuring Rob's many beautiful beauty marks, in as many locations as possible for educational purposes of RobPorney and in the name of Fan Fiction.
Materials: Laptop, Gigantic Hardrive of RobPornery, my finguhs, Google mail and a drool bucket.
Finished Product:
(click on the thumbnails for largeness)
Things I learned from this homework assignment:
1. I have WAY TOO MUCH RobPorn.
2. There is no such thing as too much RobPorn.
3. This assignment took me a long time because I got lost in said RobPorn.
4. It was gooooooooddddddd.
1. I have WAY TOO MUCH RobPorn.
2. There is no such thing as too much RobPorn.
3. This assignment took me a long time because I got lost in said RobPorn.
4. It was gooooooooddddddd.
Conclusions :
(@AngryBadgerGirl and I have hold these to be true and self evident and all that jazz)
1. He's fucking gorgeous in the face, hands, fingers, arms, legs, torso.
2. He has a sense of humor about himself.
3. He seems like a normal guy despite having ten million reasons why he could be a total douche-bag.
4. He is nerdy/dorky/awkward yet is so fuckhot that he models and makes magazine covers fly off the shelves.
5. The accent...ooohhh, the accent.
6. He is not a man-whore.
7. He could be a man-whore but a in a "gentlehobo on the streets, but a freak in the bed" kinda way.
8. The manfur. I worship at it's altar and wish to fluff it's tendrils...daily.
9. He has no ass, and we don't care because his treasure trail makes up for it.
10. He says the most random and ridiculous things ever.
(@AngryBadgerGirl and I have hold these to be true and self evident and all that jazz)
1. He's fucking gorgeous in the face, hands, fingers, arms, legs, torso.
2. He has a sense of humor about himself.
3. He seems like a normal guy despite having ten million reasons why he could be a total douche-bag.
4. He is nerdy/dorky/awkward yet is so fuckhot that he models and makes magazine covers fly off the shelves.
5. The accent...ooohhh, the accent.
6. He is not a man-whore.
7. He could be a man-whore but a in a "gentlehobo on the streets, but a freak in the bed" kinda way.
8. The manfur. I worship at it's altar and wish to fluff it's tendrils...daily.
9. He has no ass, and we don't care because his treasure trail makes up for it.
10. He says the most random and ridiculous things ever.
Examples of ridiculous things of things Rob has said and I found during tonight's assignment:
"Rob Pattinson sex toys...that don't work...and don't come with batteries."
I would totally still buy it.
"Tantra? (laughs) Sometimes, I don’t know, I like to play my own trumpet"
On what he does to keep up the sexual tension.
"I was Clive Handjob in Paris. Everyone in the hotel called me ‘Monsieur Handjob’. That was good, cheap fun."
I can give him good cheap fun...after dinner show included.
"Rob Pattinson sex toys...that don't work...and don't come with batteries."
I would totally still buy it.
"Tantra? (laughs) Sometimes, I don’t know, I like to play my own trumpet"
On what he does to keep up the sexual tension.
"I was Clive Handjob in Paris. Everyone in the hotel called me ‘Monsieur Handjob’. That was good, cheap fun."
I can give him good cheap fun...after dinner show included.
"If you’ve ever tried watching a feature length porno, you know, it’s dull… "
I have no words for him watching "Leave it in the Beaver"... seriously...
(see what I did there? hee hee)
I have no words for him watching "Leave it in the Beaver"... seriously...
(see what I did there? hee hee)
Posts
14 comments:
Oh my, mmm such a great homework i want more of those please , love ya
ode to joy!! ode to joy!!
You know my feelings on all this wonderment. And that I adore his hobohottness... the moles... oh the moles... *walks away muttering extremely inappropriate things about moles, necks and biting*
EPIC POST!
You know, we were just talking about his moles the other night...talking about a better name for them...we decided on SPHERES of ECSTASY...it sounded sexier than moles...LOL!
And I totes agree w/ conclusion 1 all the way!
N.
I laughed so hard at that "Clifford" pic!!!
Best. Post. Ever.
I am so glad to know I am not the only one that loves to look at and dream of licking Rob's moles, although I really thought those were freckles, doesn't matter, I will lick anything Rob has and needs me to lick!!!!
i just spent the last 5 minutes laughing til i cried from this right here...
7. He could be a man-whore but a in a "gentlehobo on the streets, but a freak in the bed" kinda way.
omg ang! srsly, you just frackin slayed me. you are the master!
and "treasure trail"??! holy shit i am dead! bwahahahahhaha
i heart you!
@chancecc- Would you like homework like this?
@cutie- Hobohotness...that should be trademarked. I see a cologne in th future.
@half_my_self: Spheres of Ecstasy FTW! That is epic!!!
@Annie- Clifford the big mole.
@Tesha- lick, bite, nip, kiss, whatever I can get...
@KG- I smiled when that one came to my sad-sad-sad mind. I also sang "Yeah" in my head for the next 30 minutes with that line in there...
Don't get me started on the "treasure trail" of lust...sarcastic lust...my fave kind.
Lol Ang your Blog is fucking terrific. I have no idea how you come up with all of this...you rock hon.
Bleh my internet connection is playing up & it's taking forever for all this Robporn to load...*sigh*
Although I DON'T need to see it to know that I'd "lick, bite, nip, kiss," and anything else he felt the need for *grin*
1. Clifford...I must know.
2. In the Remember Me trailer...is that his moley back?
I laughed, I cried, I may have even snorted. This was too good! And I gotta know about the Clifford mole. When I hear the name Clifford, my mind goes to Clifford, The Big Red Dog.
@Bouncy- I try, I try... <3
@FireCr0tch- Clifford the big red mole, bb...that is all. I call it Cliffie for short.
2. Ohhhh, RM trailer...you will be the death of me...lick lick.
@Smuttier- *nail* *head*
Verification word: whdress
As in...
"Rob, whdress? I am just gonna get you naked again."
BAHAHAHAHAHA!!! *hiccup* I can't freaki-*hiccup* talk from laughing so hard....
And my dogs starting howling like they do when hear an ambulance or firetruck sirens....yeah, that's how loud I was.
You are my hero for naming his mole. I think you should write a love song to Clifford.
lmfao @ "Monseiur Handjob" & the manfur "wish to fluff it's tendrils" ! I really shouldn't be reading this stuff at work! These ppl are gonna think..(know)...I'm crazy...
Absolutely the best homework ever! I must admit that I adore his moles. What is there about him that I don't like? If I figure it out, I'll let you know, but don't hold your breath.
Excellent post!
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I like to know your thoughts. They are so deep and fascinating, I mean, dirty and funny.